First let me preface by saying that i'm not referring to making friends, being a better spouse, which bros you’re going to hang with on game day or your bff for manni’s and peddi’s. I’m talking all business, baby! Now, i'm not a psychologist and have no desire to be one. I have however been in, and am fascinated by many, many different types of buyer/seller relationships and what i've found is that the rules for success, whether it be personal or in business, are the same. Here are the three rules that I live by when it comes to relationships.
1. When choosing a relationship, use the force and choose wisely you must:
Ok, so that’s something that Yoda might say to Indiana Jones when asked which cup would give everlasting life but it applies here...really!
When it comes to choosing relationships I think Dane Cook, one of the most successful comedians ever to throw out a punchline, said it best when he said:
"...we've all been there, everybody's been in that situation where you will stay with someone and you don't even like them. Two weeks in and your already like "pshh", no way, I can’t stand this person. I'll hang around another 5 or 6 years then we can end this thing violently."
Hopefully you're reading this with a smile, but seriously, how many times has this happened to you in your professional life. Whether you are the seller or the buyer early on you know, in your gut, that things just aren't jiving yet feel the need to push. If you’re the seller you may have your back up against a quota, if you’re the buyer there may be an urgent need for the product or service in play. Whatever the reason, if the mojo ain't flowin, it is the wrong reason! Walk...no...RUN away! If you're not sure if the relationship is fated for greatness or doomed then use your gut, which I like to call the force! Early on, if you're tuned in to the power of the force, then you’ll always know.
Rest assured that “breaking up”, before the relationship has a chance to bloom into a flaming bucket of yuck, is always a good move and won’t keep you from reaching your overall objective.
- Buyers; there are probably other companies that provide this particular product or service and if there isn’t, then ask for a different sales person. It may sting a little but you're doing the both of you a favor.
- Sellers; the tenacity is appreciated but not everyone should be sold. This is for your sake and for theirs. If your company is selling something that is truly unique then refer the prospective client to an associate of yours that you think would be a fit. Can you imagine what would happen if you said to the customer, "I can tell that we're just not a fit and I believe that relationships are important, but I also believe that my product will help you, so I'd like to refer you to someone who I believe you would work welll with". Holy cow! The sale would practically be a done deal! So what if you didn't get it. There will be many other opportunities and thats the stuff that gets noticed and elevates sales people into sales legends!
Speaking from experience, forcing a square peg into a round hole is a BAD idea and although it may not end in fisticuffs (hopefully), it will always end, and it won't be pretty.
2. Be like Buddha:
No, i'm not talking about shaving your head and donning a red and orange robe. I'm talking about empathy and compassion; looking at things from the other persons point of view. It is easy to get caught up in deadlines, budgets and quotas, but often times these things can get in the way and leading with them can create conflict. Chade-Meng Tan from Google gave a great talk on compassion and you can view it here.
Good business deals are all about the win-win but in order to get there you need to be able to see both "win's". You already know what your ideal win scenario is (if you don’t, then you're not ready to put a deal together) but without the other parties perspective you have no way of seeing the other side of the equation. By the way, I'm suggesting you do this for selfish reasons. Not understanding the other parties goals and objectives is how deals blow up and how you waste a lot of valuable time without getting anything in return. So what’s the secret to enlightenment? What can you do to truly understand what the other person wants? Are you ready to blow your mind? You ask!
Put your cards, all of your cards, on the table and come together with transparency (sellers this includes not only disclosing that you expect to turn a profit but exactly how much of a profit you would like to make). Most likely, not everything you both want will match up at first, but together you can find a common ground and both walk away happy. If a common ground can't be found, then isn't it a good thing you addressed this upfront, before you hit the slippery slope and risked not just this deal, but future deals together? In either case putting it all out there will only strengthen the relationship.
I mean c'mon! If compassion, empathy and transparency worked for Buddha and Google then maybe, just maybe, it can work for you too.
3. Use your relationships to the fullest: This one is my favorite and it is the reason why we designed the Avenue Bridge platform to be a relationship powerhouse.
Have you ever met someone that you liked or admired that didn't like helping people? If you have, then you should call the NSA and report an ET sighting because that person is not a person. The desire to help and connect to people is in our DNA. Feeling like we matter is part of what drives us; when we help we matter. So why is it that the buyer and seller's relationship is, most often, only reserved for just the sale? Think of what might happen if you were to open up your business relationships for additional outlying and unintended benefits, for example; what if you relied on your seller for knowledge as well as product or service?
The staffing industry, in my experience, tends to have an unusually low buyer confidence level which could be greatly increased just by implementing this one principal. The sellers of staffing services, like sellers of other products and services, are usually very knowledgable in there field. I'm not just talking about who's the best person for the job either. They are experts of the labor market including up-to-date trends of cost and time-to-hire for each and every skill set. Actually they're probably the most knowledgable because their data is in real time. They live it and breathe it every day. Isn't “cost” and “time” important when planning...well...anything?
If you're a buyer and are already asking these questions then you are AWESOME! Even if I was missing a thumb and a pinky i'd still be able to count on one hand how many times a client asked me for this type of information regularly. And here's the thing, I was happy to give away my knowledge for free because, as part of the planning, I was able to forecast my sales funnel and revenue potential with greater accuracy, plus it just felt good to feel needed. Now take this knowledge potential and multiply it by 5,10, or even 20 because that's how many vendors, in staffing anyway, a company is using at any given time. Hmmm, multiple knowledge points, on a specific subject, each with a slightly different perspective? Thats an advisory board!
Sellers... one word...referrals! Assuming you're doing everything else even halfway right then your customers like you (hurray)because people buy from people they like. If you're not asking your existing client base if they can help you grow your business then you're not doing yourself or your company any justice. Remember, your customers are people too and, like you, they enjoy helping those they like, when and however they can.
Having been on both sides of the buyer and seller's fence I've had some very bad experiences and some very good ones. In a few cases, I've been blessed with some pretty good friends that were at one point or another a client of mine, or I of theirs, and the only way that that professional relationship could cross the divide into a personal one was by using these principals. At the very least you'll do better business, faster, and with a greater sense of satisfaction. At most, who knows, you may even end up with a new bro for game day or a new girlfriend for manni’s and peddi’s. Send us your feedback, follow us, and friend us via Facebook, Twitter, or Linkedin.